YOGA BEEF + BASIC RULES

So I’m sitting here totally procrastinating. Should be working on lyrics for 2 new songs. But um, yeah. Not really doing that as you can see. I have the chorus for both but verses? They’re in a state of flux at the moment. Came home after yoga this morning, and felt so sleepy. Don’t know what the heck. Is it the weather? It was definitely colder today than it’s been lately. I mean, I was sitting in my ‘singing’ chair warming up, and I actually couldn’t keep my eyes open. WTF people? Is anyone with me? You know I’ll feel so much better about myself if you too were sleepy today, so fess up. Seriously.

Ok, I have some yoga beef. And I’m not talking about something you eat, like veggie ‘beef’ or some shit. I’m talking about issues. First off I will say I absolutely adore my yoga teacher, so this has zero to do with her. No sir. My beef is with a certain man who was in attendance today. Never seen dude before. I came in late (really didn’t start the day off right) and set up my matt beside him. Immediately I noticed his vibes. Scattered, huffy-puffy and distracted with a hint of slime-ball. So I says to myself, I says “Ayesh, chill, no judgment” and continue about my business. Most of the time I was successful at tuning out his very loud presence, but on occasion I wasn’t so successfully Zen. I kept bringing myself back though…breathe, shoulders down the back, shins resist forward…ahhhhhh. I try not to notice him looking my way. After all, he doesn’t know much, so I’m helping him right? Yeah, he’s looking to me for guidance. No judgment. Right.

After class I was in convo with some friends, when he beelines over and interrupts the cipher by pointing at my abdomen (almost touching me), saying “you have a really nice tattoo on your belly.” It was abrupt and totally out of nowhere. And carried with it that familiar ‘violated’ feeling, as he glared at it. It’s my belly people. Not my arm or some extremity. I don’t know about you but, to me, the belly is an intimate area. And it was completely covered up. It wasn’t like I was flashing that shit for all to see. The only way my tattoo would’ve been revealed is if I was in some really deep sideways stretch. Facing him. Which was rare. And even then, it would only be a sliver of a glimpse. So dude was grilling me like that?? In f’n yoga class?? Ew. I feel totally gross now. I mean if I wanted that kind of attention I’d go to the damned gym.

He also noticed my necklace (my name in Arabic) and got all up into my personal space to point at it as well- again, almost touching. Even dropped the “I couldn’t read it” and leans in closer to ‘read’ my necklace because he knows Arabic (of course). His eyes were all over my body, not once did he look me in the eye. Ew I say, ew. I sharply turn away. I mean, didn’t his mama tell him it was rude to point? I know that’s old school, but the guy was def a considerable amount older than me, so he’s gotta know that rule. And what’s up with breaking the cipher?? Just bustin’ in like an f’n rhino. He just had this intrusive, ‘grabby’ thing going on, that made me want to smack him.

For those of you who know me well (which I believe are the ONLY people who read this blog), you know how bloody hard it is for me to remain calm in these types of situations. I kept reminding myself of where I was. Yoga studio. Incense in the air. I wasn’t ‘nice’ to him, that’s for sure. Not yogic at.all. But, luckily for him I’ve been home from BK for a year now, and my edges have softened considerably. He got off easy. Slimy Bastard.

Now, if there are any males out there reading this, I will not apologize for my bitching. I will just hope that you can somehow empathize. Trust me, I’ve actually been kind and not gotten into his unattractive physical attributes. Because I DO believe that it doesn’t matter. It is the attitude that matters. My frustration makes me want to say really mean things, but I’m trying to be evolved over here. I don’t know. Do guys go through the same shit? Different pile?

Hmm.

Well, I’ll leave you with my rules to live by when approaching someone you don’t know, but may want to know. I believe these apply to men and women.

1- Don’t invade someone’s personal space. And don’t point into it either.
2- Don’t break the cipher! Whether it be convo, dancing, rhyming or whatever. Just don’t do it.
3- Look people in the eye.
4- If you shake hands, for God’s sake make it firm! Floppy handshakes are gross…

Ok. I’m tired and I can’t think anymore.
Thank you for reading my rant, I feel much better now.