Monday, June 10, 2013

Thoughts on aging...

The Baji, Mom, and Me.  Aging gracefully, one day at a time.

On my Facebook feed, a friend of a friend posted about her fear and depression at the thought of turning 30.  It made me sad.  Sad that this should be a point of dread.  For one, 30 is far from old, and two, it only gets better after 30...right?  Then I realized, I'm part of the minority.  30 is the new 20?  Why can't 30 just be...30?  I know, I live in a society that worships youth.  But youth only takes up what, 10-20% of your entire life?  Pretty ridiculous, if you ask me.

Every where I look, women are worried about getting older.  Worried about their faces, their boobs, their stomachs, legs, butt.  Either drastic measures are taken, or the towel is duly thrown in.  The option of surrender, acceptance, and change, is not presented as an alternative to the overwhelming anxiety of your cellulite dimpled thighs.  I know.  I get it.  But if you keep worrying instead of adjusting, you will forever be unhappy with how you look and feel- which will age you even faster.

Sure, at 36, I can't eat like I used to.  I gain weight more readily.  Old injuries nag at me.  I am curvier, softer, I have some wiry greys.  My stomach can no longer do sugar or wheat.  I've had to adjust my diet, and I exercise every day.  These things have not been easy to remedy.  It's hard to break lifelong habits, especially those associated with pleasure...like cake.  But I've found a way to evolve WITH my body.  I researched recipes, started cooking and baking things I never have before...and they're delicious.  I see that this is the point where many of us lose the battle.  These changes make us feel sad or helpless- or both.  We mourn the past instead of embracing the present (and future).  You can't win against this beast.  You can only learn how to move with it.  Shift, morph, adapt. 

Because the clich√© is true.  You ARE only young once.

So enjoy it and let it go man.  I will be 37 in less than 5 months, and I'm damn happy about it.  I actually can't wait to be forty.  Eighty looks particularly fun to me as well...Iris Apfel anyone?  And yeah, I know, a lot more change is gonna happen as the years float by.  I accept that it's not going to be easy, but I'm committed to paying attention.  To listening.  To evolving.  After all, what choice do we have?  Aging is inevitable.  Are you gonna spend your life worrying about something you can't avoid?  Wisdom is not gained by avoiding the inevitable.  It's gained by facing it.

I am intent on becoming a very old, very wise woman.  Please, come join me.



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